Being a 'young' mum

                      

I was 20 years old still kinda recovering from my gorgeous Nana passing when I found out I was pregnant, baby daddy was 24. Me & Adam had been together for 5 and a half years at this point, we were living in our own house and just living each day as it came, we had no major plans or goals at this point as we had just had all the stress from buying our first home and saving up for that was crazy!! Both me and Adam were in shock when we found out we were expecting our first baby, we always spoke about being parents and having our own family but we never actually imagined 'really having a baby'. Once both me and Adam got our heads around the news we decided we were going to tell close family and friends. Family members and friends questioned if we were ready for children at this point but I had no doubt in my mind that this was the right thing for me. There is so much stigma about being a young mum and television programmes such as Jeremy Kyle seem to fuel this, it really does give young mums such a bad name and also a false image. Having a child young does not mean that you are any less capable than an older parent. I think as long as you can LOVE, guide and teach your children then that is the most important thing you can give them. As a young parent I feel an easy target to judgement and criticism from associates, professionals and mainly strangers. 

I love being a young mum, I honestly love the fact that when my children grow up and start to fend for themselves and become independent I will still be young enough to enjoy experiences with them and we will have such a nice family bond and be so close together. Then me and there dad can enjoy our life together whilst our children are doing there own thing.... first thing, CRUISE!!!!

I remember people used to say things like "you have ruined your life, your life is over now" just because I was having my first child. How horrible is that? I would never dream of saying such a thing to somebody even now I know how challenging being a parent can be. 
I mean obviously you have to not live your life as much as you probably would do in your early 20's as much like going out every weekend both Friday and Saturday, then maybe through the week as well. But seriously, looking at it from a bigger picture, am I actually missing anything? Me & Adam still go out with friends, but its just a 'different kind of going out' (well sometimes not for me, if you know me you know I don't quite know when to go home when I get out haha).

“You look too young to have kids”
Especially when Primrose was more of a baby, like if I was out in public and Primrose was crying, I could feel people looking at me and I knew they would be thinking "she doesn't even know what to do with that baby, she's too young" I could always tell by there faces who were the judgmental moaning ones, the ones who when I looked at them they would instantly look away. But I loved them ones who give me the look as if to say, your doing a great job I know how hard it is. Some women and some men can be so horrible, like do you not know my hormones are through the roof right now?! Maybe I was being a little too paranoid, but I'm also not daft!
What am I meant to say to this?? I’d love to say well I am biologically in my prime for having babies actually HUN. But instead I smile and boil up inside and keep my comments to myself, well, most of the time. I know what some of you might be thinking. I should take it as a compliment, with my next child I definitely will "thanks for your kind words HUN, the botox is working then" MWAHAHAHA!
I really don't know why humans today think this is acceptable to say this? Would you ever say to an older woman “you look too old to have kids”? It really does baffle me.

Even now Primrose is here, I truly believe children better you as individuals, you instantly want the best in life and definitely wish for the best for your children, they literally are your world and you would do anything for them. Therefore having children really does give you a little kick up the bum and makes you realise, life is too short and if you want something go out and get it. Me & Primroses dad are mega happy with life as parents and we do not in any way feel like having children 'ruins your life'. They bring so much joy, a day doesn't go by where you aren't laughing your head off - well when your not pulling your hair out that is. 

I am so glad my life chose for me to have children from a young age, if I was to have children in my late 30's I really do think I wouldn't have the energy you need for children; e.g night feeds, being a house wife, running after your crazy child who made it to the other side of the supermarket in 0.5 seconds!!!!!! Please tell me I am not the only one who has had this unwanted attention?

Love
PAIGE PICKERING

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